When you’re a writer, you leave a little piece of yourself on display every time you publish something. It’s worse when you’re a nonfiction writer—knowing that people will take what you say as fact, slowly building an image of the person who shared their thoughts and desires with the world.

It’s different being an editor. There’s anonymity and mystery that comes with my name appearing so far away from the words I write. The changes and shifts I mark on the page are still me, but no one knows it. They’re attributed to someone else.

It all begs the question: Who are the post- editors, really? How do you know you can trust us to dig into our writers’ work, rearranging, deleting, and making the final decisions on what appears before your eyes? Are we just running an elaborate identity theft scheme?

In an effort to increase transparency within the organization, I asked our editors a series of questions scientifically proven to reveal their inner psyche. Though short, this questionnaire peels back the curtain and exposes what truly makes them tick. I’ve compiled their results and made them available below. Take the quiz, see where you fall along the continuum, and answer for yourself: What truly happens behind our closed doors?

Let's start off easy: What are you concentrating in?

1. Humanities
2. Social sciences
3. STEM
4. Social sciences and the humanities
5. Psychoceramics

Hands down, the undisputed #1 dining hall is...

1. Ratty
2. V-Dub
3. Ivy Room
4. Andrews
5. Jo's

Do you have any siblings?

1. No
2. Yes, 1
3. Yes, 2
4. Yes, 3 or more
5. Yes, and I do not like them very much

On a Saturday, I wake up at...

1. 6 a.m. (to get a head start on the day)
2. 6 a.m. (to exercise)
3. 6 a.m. (to go back to sleep)
4. 10 a.m.
5. 5 p.m.

How do you toast your marshmallows?

1. Gently rotate it until a light golden-brown
2. Put it in the flames and carefully, patiently, twist the stick until AHHHHHHH FIRE
3. Set it on fire (on purpose)
4. In a pan with Rice Krispies
5. I like them raw.

Is a hot dog a sandwich?

1. Oh no
2. No???
3. NO
4. If the shoe fits...
5. Absolutely!

What is your wishing object of choice?

1. The clock at 11:11
2. My birthday candles
3. My sibling-who-I-do-not-like-very-much's birthday candles
4. A shooting star
5. The Monkey's Paw (no it's not, you liar)

It's 11:50 p.m. I prefer to travel by...

1. Walking
2. Car
3. Bike/scooter (electric or otherwise)
4. Depends on the distance
5. Magic pumpkin carriage

What is your dream house?

1. A CASTLE
2. A Hobbit hole <3
3. A beach house with steps that lead right into the water so that I can make dolphin friends (I do not fear the Tizheruk)
4. The sad little cabin in the woods I built by myself #Thoreau #nature #independence #???
5. The Dreamhouse from Barbie® Life in the Dreamhouse™ trademarks by ©Mattel. All Rights Reserved.

You met the love of your life, but didn't catch their name! The next logical step is to...

1. Wait. If it's meant to be, the universe will bring you back together.
2. Slide into their DMs. Someone reposted a story with a familiar wall, and they follow this other person...
3. Find their LinkedIn. Six degrees of connection, baby.
4. Die tragically of a broken heart. It's over.
5. Realize they left their super special shoe on the stairs and have every single person in the kingdom try it on because you are 100% certain that they are custom-made and could not possibly fit more than one person, and honestly, you don't really remember what they look like, so this is all you've got.

Each answer corresponds to a number of points. Add up your points to determine your post-ness score!

*What do the stars mean?

If you picked every answer with a star, add +478 points to your total score. Otherwise, ignore them and proceed!

If your score is 0-10: 

So what if you wouldn’t be considered a senior citizen, can’t legally drink, and have yet to learn how to forge your parents’ signature on your permission slips assuming you were the same age as your score? You’re young and full of whimsy! Besides, it’s still not as bad as what you got on your last orgo midterm. Lucky for you, like all the creative writing classes here, post- is mandatory S/NC, and most of your grade is dependent on your participation. Who knows—you might even snag the elusive S with Distinction. So pull up to our socials and say hi!

If your score is 11-20:

Perhaps you got a lot of hugs from your parents as a child or have the rare winning combination of owning both a license and a car on campus. (Ugh. Jealous.) Maybe you came back from the dead to do a light spot of haunting for Halloween, but were so traumatized by all the couples’ costumes that you forgot to cross back over, and now you’re stuck. (Um. Less jealous?) Whatever the reason for why you’re in this category, you’re still welcome at post-. We’ll see you around!

Unless you like raw marshmallows. Get out, you heathen.

If your score is 21-30:

You’d fit right in with all the weird and wonderful things that make post- all that it is! At times, you are practical—factoring in distance before you decide to call a Lyft or jump in a pumpkin carriage (‘tis the season?)—yet sometimes, you find yourself questioning your sanity as you dig through LinkedIn profiles. If you ever stop by our office, you’ll be at home, surrounded by like-minded people who find joy in the intellectual debate of whether or not a hot dog is a sandwich.

If your score is 31-50:

Have you considered working for USPS? Because with a score like that, you must be the epitome of all things post-! I bet your keyboard and mirror are covered in Post-it notes, your books are full of color-coded tabs, and everyone asks you for a pen because you carry the entire rainbow around despite taking notes on Google Docs. You might postpone things a little too much (Why yes, that article deadline is judging you while you're pretending to care about perfectly folding your fitted sheet...), but you somehow always pull through.

If your score is 500:

Cinderella? Is that you? Maybe if the post- team were awake and working as early as you, we would have time for balls with fancy canapés and lavish dresses instead of typing away in our little office at 88 Benevolent. Oh well. See you and the mice at the Ratty for dinner tomorrow? I’ll send a GCal invite! (Hey, does anyone have an extra swipe?)